Sat. Jun 3rd, 2023

Photo credits:, edited by Emily Hart

On March 26, 2023, The Quad published “Progress Being Made In Schmucker Science Center Renaming,” which can be found in the News section on pg. 17! “Following the criticism and calls for the removal of the Schmucker Science Center name, West Chester University has begun the process of investigating, terminating and renaming the building.” Schmucker Science Center was named after an individual who published eugenics theories, something all students and faculty are all too aware of after the dozens of articles posted on the matter. I am here to say that the renaming of the building should come easy to faculty. There is one day a year that commemorates what West Chester University is all about, where everyone lives in harmony and inner peace becomes outer peace. A day that showcases the culturally rich education that we pay for! 

This year will mark the 27th anniversary of West Chester University’s Banana Day! The most a-peeling part of Banana Day is that the boring required day-to-day routines become essentially optional. This historical holiday event is one that deserves to be observed nationwide. Banana Day is a self-care day of sorts. It is a pre-finals stress buster and celebrates a quirky take on mental health. The academic and residential quads are filled with various vendors and events from frisbee and hacky sack, to banana themed minute to win it style games. Unique banana themed t-shirts are designed and given out to students in the quad during the events. Potentially the most notable part of Banana Day is the photo opportunities with the banana mascot. At last year’s Banana Day, Evan, a SAC member was quoted stating “It’s a beautiful moment for our school’s culture,” Evan said, “it’s a great time to make some new friends and boost that school spirit. Nobody really knows what Banana Day is, so it’s a nice surprise waking up and there’s just a ton of bananas everywhere. It adds to the magic of the day.” Banana Day had its resurgence last year after being virtual for two years, and this year’s bananza is scheduled for Wednesday April 19, 2023. 

My proposal is for Schmucker Science Center to be renamed after Banana Day. President Fiorentino could avoid all of the politics and anxiety over the building’s renaming by honoring a spiritual day on campus. Banana Building would bring a bright disposition to such a dreary and problematic building on campus. The eyesore of the greige stone building should be painted banana yellow, with a new mural added on the lower level. What should be on the mural? You guessed it: Bananas. The display cases on the entry level floor could be filled with past year’s Banana Day artifacts including various editions of Banana Day shirts, the infamous banana costume, alongwith cases of bananas for decoration purposes. 

The decision for what to rename Schmucker Science Center is yet to be made. My guess is that talks of the renaming are already in the works and that President Fiorentino will announce the Banana Building this year on April 19 aka Banana Day. Construction will commence over the summer, and Banana Building will be revealed by the time the incoming Freshman class moves into their dorms. Who will cut the yellow ribbon at the unveiling? Rammy of course, with his 27 wives dressed in their very own banana suits.


DISCLAIMER: This article is part of The Quak, a satirical series of articles that are released in commemoration of April Fools Day.

Emily Hart is a fourth year produce major with a minor in shits and giggles.

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