Fri. Jun 14th, 2024

West Chester Hotels are now said to be padlocking yogurt after 8 A.M. Guests have complained that their favorite meal of the day is now being ruined by these new procedures that have been in effect since 1923 by the borough. 

One guest said that when his Uber driver pulled up to the entrance of one of these family friendly hotels, he asked, “You sure?”

As yogurt is the “foundation to waking up and feeling good,” according to one of the hotel staff, for guests to even get their hands on it, they need to wake up at extreme hours to consume this desirable product. 

Along with being expensive, hotels are now losing revenue from the town after receiving multiple complaints about their, “missed yogurt opportunities.” 

The question that everyone is asking is, when will hotels finally sell their yogurt at a reasonable hour? When will guests finally get the yogurt they so rightfully deserve? 


DISCLAIMER: This article is part of The Quak, a satirical series of articles that are released in commemoration of April Fools Day.

Sean Wattman is a second-year psychology major with a minor in journalism.

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