Yes, I know the easy answer to this is a vacation. But we all know it’s not that simple to escape responsibilities, especially while in college. For me, my day-to-day campus life got so boring and redundant that I couldn’t take it anymore, whether it was hanging out with friends or going to class. It didn’t matter what we were doing, it was the fact that we were doing it at the same time and in places that made me feel a different way about it. On top of that, this feeling increased with my birthday approaching.
I felt very introverted and dull, doing homework, eating from the same places and going to meetings — it all felt so uninteresting for me. I knew I had to get off this campus, but questions started to form in my head. How long do I go for? Where do I go? What should I do now so I’m not damaging my grades when I come back? Once I found answers and compromises to these questions and more, I left. Now, I’m not saying this was the best way to handle this but it was my way.
I knew even before this feeling I wanted to be alone for my birthday, so this might’ve been a blessing in disguise. I wasn’t able to get the escape I hoped for because of timing issues and my impulsiveness, but this was where I made some compromises. I started doing things I love doing, whether it was creative writing, making aesthetics, buying crystals, eating good food, driving around or watching my favorite things, because that was also a catalyst when I started feeling this way. I ended up taking a week off, on campus. I still did work and other responsibilities, but on a slower and less active level.
I still need it, and I’m still gonna get the true escape I wanted when this semester ends, which is soon, so I can fully decompress my freshman year as a whole and future endeavors — but it was nice to just get a glimpse of what I wanted.
As for my birthday, it came and went, and a lot of eye-opening things happened then as well. I’m back, level-headed now. As I return to campus, I realized I’m going to soak in the last of my freshman year as I enter sophomore in the fall. I know most of this is not going to be the same next time. I know that I’m not alone in this feeling, and some people have other ways of dealing with it than me. Understanding that college isn’t always fun is essential here, to earn and experience something not a lot of people have the opportunity to achieve for multiple reasons that they would love to. Making the most of it is key, and finding ways to better your own experience is important for not only how you interact with people, but how you yourself feel and your happiness.
Isaiah Ireland is a first-year Media & Culture major. II978280@wcupa.edu