Afterthoughts – Your one-stop Shop has exciting news!
Announcing new Mother’s Day hours!
As many of our loyal customers know, Afterthoughts has traditionally only been open on Christmas Eve and Valentine’s Day. This year we are extending our hours to include Mother’s Day!
Afterthoughts is a one-stop gift repurposing depository. We’ve acquired some authentic gems this year. Although not diamonds, we do have some topaz-in-the-rough.
Don’t know what to get that special lady in your life? No problem. Just come in and grab anything off the shelf at random. Take a look at both in-store or online fabulous options like:
- Pots and pans that your grandmother would have got for free in 1957 when opening up a Chemical Bank Account. Still in the original box with a gleaming smile of an Aryan housewife in heels on the cover!
or
- Pick something from our funky-clunky-chunky collection of jewelry regifted to us from someone’s great Aunt Dorothy. Great Aunt Esther took the pearls and diamond engagement ring, but just look at the stuff she left:
- Brooches galore!
- Clip-on earrings
- Balls of knotted chains – so fun to untangle, she will be busy for hours!
- For our more frugal shoppers, we have substantially discounted heart-shaped boxes of chocolate from such high-end brands as Russel Stover and Signature Select. She will love the retro-chic of ash whiteness speckled on these yummy confections.
- Or sign up for our special Wilted Passions Club. Each month your lucky lady will receive a bouquet of aromatic leftovers that didn’t sell the previous month at your local Wawa.
As always, we have some helpful hints from our staff. Jenny, our marketing director says:
“If you can’t even make the effort to get to our store to shop for your little lady, we also have great gift ideas for when you’re out and about. When you’re at Shoprite, Waldbaum’s or Acme, turn down aisle 17 and pick up some sexy Leggs Control Top pantyhose or a housecoat for those lazy days at home when she’s too depressed to get dressed. If you’re more of a Whole Foods shopper, then just grab a hemp infinity scarf and throw it in the cart with your other items. It’s fair trade, so she really can’t complain!”
Afterthoughts – Because nothing says “you were an afterthought” like waiting till the last possible second.
Denise Kaplan is in her first year of the Creative Writing Track, Masters in English Program at WCU. DK967352@wcupa.edu