Women are always trying to understand men, but how often do men consider the inner circuitry of women? Women’s magazines, movies, literature, and television inspire women to get down to the nitty gritty details of the men in their lives, or the potential men in the future. Questions like, “What’s the best way to intensify a guy’s orgasm?” “How come guys masturbate even when they’re in a relationship and having lots of sex?” “Do men worry about what they look like naked?” “How does he manage to scarf down three hamburgers?” These plague this month’s Cosmopolitan magazine. I almost want to hide myself from public view to avoid even glancing at it (it’s pushed to the far corner of my desk at work). Why must we break down every single detail of the male spirit and sexuality to make sense of our relationships? Why can’t we just be satisfied with our relationship, and enjoy it?
I am not saying that I do not question things with men. I often wonder why my partner cannot rip himself away from video games, or can play cards for literally 3 hours or more. Trivia night is his night with the boys. What is so fun about trivia, I do not know. I wonder why he doesn’t care enough to shave his facial hair when I have the social responsibility to shave my underarms, as well as my legs. I wonder why drinking a 30 pack of beers with friends is a bonding experience, but it is. That said, I do not yearn for answers.
Men and women are two distinct beings, and we should appreciate each other for who we are. Women spend money for fun when we should probably be saving it. We also paint our nails to pass time and often bond over chick flicks, a bag of Hershey kisses and possibly a bottle of wine. We hug each other, remark on each others’ clothing and think about caloric intake. We put pictures of inspirational sayings on our walls, and have boxes for ex-boyfriends. The list goes on and on. But men do not seek this information about us. They simply let the characteristics and behaviors of women unfold organically, and dismiss the information as useless or acknowledge it as existent, but move on.
I used to try to concentrate on the “right” way to please a man sexually, but really, a man feels lucky to even have sex, period. Frankly, he would be nuts to complain if you tried any different massage, lick or position. From my understanding, experimentation excites him, and your enthusiasm for his sexual satisfaction feels invigorating. In regards to his appetite, male and female stomach durability is different.
Also, masculinity is associated with how much one can eat. My partner even today mentioned his recognition that he was unable to match his friends in the eating department. One friend ate 50 pieces of sushi. Big whoop. To us women, that kind of behavior is just ludicrous, but we should leave it at that, end of story.
So, to conclude this rampage on the female curiosity, I ask you to not question men’s silly little obsessions, sexual desires or quirks. I plead with you to appreciate those things for what they are. No quick answer will give you the satisfaction of knowledge, so go out there and, for the love of God, just find the answers yourself through allowing yourself to experience the pleasure of not knowing.
Carla Schwager is a student at West Chester University. She can be reached at CS728329@wcupa.edu.