Sun. May 26th, 2024

Yet another four years have passed Seth. Look back at everything you’ve done since then, what’s the evidence of your existence?  

I wish so badly I could write my first and last senior piece with a theme of whimsical young adulthood. But as I look back at all that I have done in these past four years, all I can see is the bad. I remember all the lovers I hurt, the friends I’ve lost, the potential that’s been wasted, the time that I’ll never get back. Why is it all so broad? So bleak? These events come back to me so much more clearly than the good. West Chester has stripped me of everything that I thought I was and showed me what I am. I saw through my skin, I saw me on the inside, and within lay a horrid sight. A hole, one that would absorb the light of all who surrounded me without remorse if given the chance. It’s only in this past year I’ve been able to look at that space and accept that it is a part of me, wounds like this one take time to heal properly. All of this is to say that through the dark, finally, the light reveals itself to me. I want nothing more now than to give all of me to those who do the same.

It is such a shame that it took so much pain to get here, countless weekends of solitude came long before being surrounded by friends. While effortless for some, it literally took years to build this community of people I’ve surrounded myself with. Tears slip from my eyes as I write this, knowing that the ones I’ve grown so fond of I may never see again. I fear that the test of time will threaten the web of relations I’ve spun over these past four years. I fear that Seth Lopez will be nothing more than an afterthought that plays in the back of your head once a month; a name that some will curl their faces to, while others reminisce of simpler times spent here in this tiny town. 

To my friends, and my mom too (love you mom!): If you’re reading this, I am not a lost cause. I am capable of loving myself, and others. I am so imperfect, I am glutinous, I am flawed inside and out. But I am present, I am alive and you’ve all played a great role in my pursuit of self. Thank you so much for everything. Though I won’t be a five-minute walk away, I will cherish every moment I have spent here with you all. The loud moments, the silent ones too, all I can offer is love from me to you. 

This is meant to be a time of triumph, evolution and joy so I will fill the rest of the page with that energy. I did it, just the thought alone makes me tear up a bit. College was without a doubt the most stressful time of my life, this school knows exactly how to strike a nerve in me, but I won West Chester, you may have taken my money, my credit score, my ego, and my sense of self but in the very end I am the one who walks away; a shiny piece of paper saying “good job Seth” in hand. As the curtains close on my matinee, I will take as many bows as I can. Thank you. Enjoy your peace, enjoy the silence, it isn’t so bad. 

Be well

-Seth A Lopez 

 


Seth Lopez is a Fourth-year Criminal Justice Major with an Arts Minor SL961440@wcupa.edu

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