‘Tis nearly Valentine’s Day, fellas, when you’re expected to sit down with your gal to see “The Vow,” or something like it.
Something very dangerous to your relationship, your self-esteem. Starring someone like Channing Tatum _ bigger, better-looking, unafraid of commitment, supplied by screenwriters with an endless supply of cute things to say and do.
In “The Vow” Tatum asks his girlfriend to move in with him by spelling out the question in the blueberries he places next to the pancakes he’s just made for her.
See what I mean?
You cannot compete with that.
And yet you do owe her that flick. The trick is to find something you both find rewarding. Something with true love, and true grit. So here are the five most guy-friendly romantic movies you can watch.
5. “Shaun of the Dead.”
Yes, it’s a zombie movie, but the zombies are really a backdrop for the story of a backsliding boyfriend trying to win back the girl he doesn’t deserve. And Simon Pegg is not Channing Tatum.
4. Anything by Ron Shelton.
He’s known as a guy who makes movies about sports, but he really makes movies about love and sex _ “Bull Durham,” “Tin Cup,” “White Men Can’t Jump.”
3. “Say Anything.”
You have to have writer-director Cameron Crowe on this list. He’s popular with both genders because he plays fair with male and female characters. “Jerry Maguire” would work, or even “Singles,” but we need something here for the teen demo.
2. “Die Hard.”
Why does Bruce Willis kill every member of a global assortment of terrorists who take over an office tower? For love, of course.
1. “The Terminator.”
Still James Cameron’s greatest love story, with apologies to “Titanic.” Guy travels through time to save the woman who will give birth to the man who will save the world from cyborgs, and ensures that she does by actually fathering the child.
Take that, Nicholas Sparks.