Wed. Jan 19th, 2022

If there’s one thing that I have always considered myself to be, it’s a man of the people. From my completely normal obsession with Johnny Depp to my tendency to quadruple check my car doors and headlights just to make sure that they are locked and off respectively— I’m basically just your average, run of the mill college student.

I buy “Terminator 2” toys off of Amazon.com just like the rest of you.

So, it is in this spirit of supreme average-ness that I bring to the table today a topic that I’m sure is near and dear to the hearts and minds of the entire campus. A wrong that must be righted before any of us can return to our very normal sleeping patterns (2:30 a.m. to 10:05 a.m., duh).

The bike racks on this campus are far, FAR from adequate. Sure there are plenty of them, but most have the same frustrating flaw that renders them completely useless.

That flaw is that they are completely open and unsheltered to the elements. When it rains, your bike will get nice and drenched. Snowfall? Enjoy! This constant exposure to the elements can lead to many problems, the biggest and angriest of which is rusting.

Now, no one likes rust. Unless, of course, you’re talking about a new pair of rust-colored slacks. That is a different story entirely.

Would it be such a big deal to place some of these racks UNDER something? Something besides a tree? I’m not saying that more people would ride bikes on campus if better accommodations were made. but I’m just saying.

WCU is really good on a lot of this green stuff. There are motion sensors everywhere that save electricity and there is that wonderful geo-thermal dealy that replaced the athletic courts on the corner of New and Rosedale. You know, the thing that was, until very recently, covered in hay or seas of water?

The point is that, sometimes the best answers are the easiest and cheapest. What would it cost to throw at roof over two or three bike racks? WCU doesn’t need motion-activated text books— though that would be cool— what we need are bike racks in places that make sense.

Give students better alternatives to the buses or walking and don’t allow Mother Nature to punish them for doing something different. Right now, WCU isn’t a very bike-friendly campus but we can do better! Maybe a good go green strategy would be fewer busses and more walking between North and South Campus. It’s only a 15 minute walk folks! Now, I’m no Lance Armstrong when it comes to physical fitness, so if I can do it, you can too.

Hold on now. I just had a thought. Why waste money on bike racks, when we can spend it on things we REALLY need, like more Purell dispensers! Silly me! Now, if only we could install new Purell dispensers NEXT to the existing ones because those things are probably crawling with nasty, nasty bacteria by now.

Yes sir! That’s spending money! It’s those kinds of ideas that make me the man of the people that I am. If you’ll excuse me, I need to go see if I can name all the countries of the world in under ten minutes on Sporcle.com.

Just an average afternoon.

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